Saturday, April 23, 2016

Throw away people

In case you are new to my blog or have as bad a memory as I have, I live in a Continuing Care Retirement Community.  Folks move in her and live in Independent living.  For the most part, they are social, energetic, mobile, people.  At some point, some of them are moved to Assisted Living or Skilled Care.  Both of those care levels where I live are s good as they can be.  Assisted living offers some assistance with daily issues and three wonderful meals a day.  Skilled care is Skilled Care.  However, here it is done with a more "Human" approach.

I visit people I minister to in Skilled Care.  Many of them are still mentally active.  Some, have declined.  And still, some have Dementia to the point they are no longer interactive.  One of the things I have noticed is, people that are moved to Assisted Living or Skilled Care, without their spouse, are forgotten after a short period of time.  How is that?  Forgotten?!

Yes, forgotten.  They are not visited by their spouse, their children, or even their friends in our community.  The people I know in Skilled Care and Assisted Living hunger for a conversation a loving touch, even a smile.  I know of one nice lady, who is mobile, and very confused by Alzheimer's.  Her husband seldom visits her.  He tells me, she is better off that way.

Look folks, even if the person does not recognize you, they at least know you are friendly and they will talk to you, smile, and want your attention.  They are not dead!! 

It seems little has changed in the attitudes people have of the elderly.  Put them in a nice facility, and forget about them.   After all, there are people there, trained and paid to take care of them.  I have my life to live.

Even people living in Independent living have few visitors and even fewer overnight guests.  Mostly, people come to eat dinner in the dinning room and then leave, spending two hours with their supposed loved one, at best!   I guess thy come to see when they will receive their inheritance check.

King Solomon was right;  Every thing is vanity.

1 comment:

  1. Just came across your blog and this particular post really hit home with me. My husband & I are caring for my father in law at home, he has LBD and needs 24 hour care. It's been a sore spot for me, how his family members don't visit, in particular his two grown grandchildren. His great granddaughter visits but that is because she is here with me for babysitting. His daughter comes for about an hour every two weeks, except for the half of the year when she lives in another part of the country.
    My husband I are left to deal with everything & we pay cnas to stay when we want to get out for a few hours. I'm told seeing him this way is just too sad for them. And to that I say: well, how do you think HE FEELS?