Someone sent me a comment thanking me for being so courageous. Nothing could be farther from the truth. And if I portray myself as brave or courageous as I face LBD, forgive me, because I am scared to death!
Yes, I write about what is happening to me. Why, because it helps me deal with my issues and I truly believe it may help others. But, I am scared over the future. That is one of the reasons I plan, project, research, and worry so much. You don't see my tears or my fearful thoughts, especially at night when I am alone with my thoughts.
I was brave, or stupid, either one, when I was a Navy Gunner's Mate and we would have a casualty in the gun mount that would involve ammunition, ready to explode. Then, my knowledge, training, and wits could help me survive. Now, there is no survival. Only a slow decline into oblivion. And now I know, as I did when I was working around enough explosives to sink my own ship, that only GOD is in control of my life.
Me courageous? Not really. But I do helplessly depend on GOD for my future. I recommend that plan for each of you too.