Saturday, October 11, 2014

Doing what I liked to do, one more time

I am a NASCAR fan.  I watched a race, a few years ago, that Mark Martin won.  In the post race interview, he was in tears.  Mark said,  I know I may never win another race, so this is so emotional to me!

Today, my son and I went shooting at a new indoor range in Pensacola.  It is a "Class A" facility in all aspects.  As good as Camp Allen in Norfolk.  Just James and I.  We had breakfast, went shooting, in a very relaxed atmosphere, and the range personnel were friendly and engaging.  It was a good time and I eve shot pretty well.  Yes, my vision gives me pro blame.  I can no longer see the front and rear sights, and the target.  So, I have to line up my front and rear sights and then look at the blur that should be the target.  But, I know how to compensate.  Maybe I should change to "front sight" shooting.

The Mark Martin story came to mind and I realized this could be the last time I go shooting.  I tired easily and we were only on the range for about 90 minutes.  When I was an active shooter, I could shoot all day and still be fresh.  I remember IDPA matches at Blackwater in North Carolina where I would shoot, moving from one stage to another, all day in the heat.  Yes, I was tired at the end of the day, but I could still shoot the night shoot!  Today, I came home and took a nap.

The reality of all this is, LBD has robbed me of stamina, strength, and vision.  All things necessary to do what I have loved to do, for a long time.  Days like today illuminate the losses I have experienced.  These days bring all the is negative about LBD to the forefront.   Maybe, that is why I seldom do things like this.  When I do, I realize where I am in my journey.

Still, I enjoyed my day,  My son looked out for me all day,  He looks for the signs that am getting tired.   When I was younger, and so was he, he would complain if I wanted to leave the range before dark.  Now, he takes carer of me.  Days like today are important to me.  Bonding time with my son.  I need to make more of these happen.

Sometimes, it is hard to judge where I am in this journey.  On days like today, my position on the map that shows my journey with LBD is very evident.


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