Monday, November 4, 2013

Traveling, or not

One of my mentors in the Navy passed away last December and their are just planning his funeral for next weekend.  There were some legal issues and the parties involved have finally decided to bury the Master Chief.  I have been in contact with his Niece and have been invited to the funeral.  But, as much as I would like to be there, I just can't make myself leave my friendly confines and travel.

There was a Ship's Reunion for the USS Caron.  A ship and crew that holds a very special place in my heart.  I did not go, even though we planned to go.  Why, because I just could not bring myself to travel 1200 miles and stay in a place I have no connection to.

Yes, we went back to Virginia Beach in September.  But that was home and I was glad to be there.  I knew my way around, had friends to be with, and visit.   I was in my home Church and always surrounded with familiar locations and people.  So, I was pretty good with that trip.

But truthfully, I wonder if I will ever go anywhere overnight again!  I really cannot describe the feelings that stop me from traveling.  In the planning stages of the USS Caron reunion, I was somewhat excited.  But as we fleshed out the plans of the travel, I became completely overwhelmed!!  Planning the trip became a total block to me going.  I feel safe in my home and the ares around it.  Hotels are OK, for a night, if I can have Marcel the wonder dog with me.  But I don not feel safe or comfortable in crowds of people I do not know.  I do not like mass travel venues like airports.   And I want to be in familiar surroundings all the time.

Then there is the cost.  I do not participate in the day to day finances of the household.  But, from what I hear, I need to be careful as to how we spend money.  That being said, she we are planning a trip, I become frightened of spending money.

I guess, all in all, I am afraid to travel much past the bridge that leads to Pensacola!   Will I travel again, I don't know.  There is little I want to do or see.  I loved being back in Virginia Beach since I miss my friends, the Church, and the area so much.  And my wife has a family reunion in Iowa next July that is very important to her.  So, those may be the only two trips we make.

Maybe it is the planning that bothers me.  If we just got up and went,  I might be better.  I am not sure and it confuses me to ponder this topic too much.  But, as this blog is about the journey, I thought I had better address this topic while I remembered.  More later.  

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