Monday, January 25, 2010

I don't know what's happening, but its' happening fast!

In the Navy, I knew a fellow Gunner's Mate who had a quip for everything. He could make me laugh at the drop of a hat, and when things were going wrong, quickly, he used to say; "I don't know what's happening, but its' happening fast!" Well, in the last few weeks, that seems to be where I am with my PD and Dementia. I have already told you about my recent issue, living out my dreams. The pills the Neurologist gave me seem to be helping and my wife is getting used to sleeping with her catcher's mask on. Now, I am having problems figuring our where I am, especially at night. We went to bed last night, all tucked in, my wife had her catcher's mask on, and I was just drifting off to sleep when I was overwhelmed with the feeling that I did not know where I was. My wife was almost asleep and I woke her to ask, where are we? Are we home? I truly did not know. It is a frightening feeling. She assured me that we were safe, at home, in our bed, and I went back to sleep. But this is a new development and one that I intend to monitor. I suppose my wife is also!

Additionally, I spend more and more time, thinking about the past, old shipmates, old stories. The Internet is not my friend here, because I can search and find old friends, or more depressing, their obituaries. Its' not that we don't get out, my wife makes sure that we go somewhere and interact with people everyday. We go to the recreational center three days a week and get a vigorous physical workout. It's those down times, that my mind slips back to the past and I am in my own world. It's not frightening, just detached. Actually, I am more comfortable there sometimes, not always. Oh, well, I am sure other have had these issues before. And I am not complaining, just keeping you informed. Again, being able to discuss changes helps me deal with them. Any feedback from anyone, I would really appreciate it.

1 comment:

  1. Your ability to express your feelings about the changes helps me in understanding my husband a little better. Hopefully making me a better caregiver.

    Glad your wife found her catchers mask (had to giggle when i read that) :)

    If she has an internet interest there is a Lewy Body spousal support group that you can both be a part of. It is a WORLD of valuable information and insight.

    Thank you for sharing