Tuesday, February 25, 2020

Looking at the end

Who is Don Dolence?  I am the  first illegitimate son of a Cleveland bar maid who had four children out of wedlock in the 1050s..  Raised by wonderful people that we're no related to rebut loved me like   I was their own blood.  I quit school in the 12th grade and joined the Navy after breaking every rule and law that existed.   I found a home in the Navy because the rules applied to every enlisted person, equally.  I worked hard and promoted fast.   I drank too much, paid that price many times, and still succeeded in the Navy.  I made may friends and many great men mentored me, including Bill Mowery, James Smith, Harold Simpson, Sam Johnson, Dave Armstrong, Carl Morris, Red Mills, and many others.

I made Master Chief Gunner's Mate much earlier than most.  (14.5 years of service)  Retired as the Force Master Chef, Surface Forces, Atlantic Fleet.  Went to work for the Navy as a Tech Rep and spent 20 more years in Civil Service, retired as a GS 13.

More important, I accepted Jesus Christ s my personal Savior, became an Ordained Pastor in the Grace Brethren Church and had my best times working for the Lord.

I was diagnosed wit Lewy Body Dementia and had a very smooth glide slope until recently.  

Now, Things are getting difficult.  But I still depend on Jesus to see me through the difficult times. I have no anger, not grief, now frustration about my disease.

 I am Still a Master Chief Gunner's Mate.  I Still like to drink beer.  I Still like good, old Country Music.  George Jones, Merle Haggard, Hank, Willie, Waylon.

Why do I write this?  Because I an fading, yet who I was is still who I am.  I miss my shipmates.  I still miss being a Tin Can Sailor.  I still miss being me...

Sunday, February 2, 2020

Noise is my enemy!!

More and more, I get instantly agitated over noise and anything that interrupts my train of thought.  It is not a slow boil, it is instant anger.  Television is the worst offender!  My wife wants the television on 24/7 and the commercials do not bother her.  She lo es to comment on whatever is on the television, and it irritates me.  Of course, I can't say much.  So, I steam even more.   Of course, that causes BP issues and some dizziness.

That is the best feature of "The Cabin".  I seldom have the TV on and no-one talks to me because the door is locked.  Works for me.

I need quiet, alone time, and control of may environment to keep an even keel.

Another issue that seems to be increasing is vision difficulties.  Things seem far away and indistinct.  I laugh everyone I shave.  When I was a littler boy, I would ask my Dad why he wore his glasses when he shaved.  Now I know!  If I did not wear my glasses, I would cut my nose off!  But even with my strong glasses, I have difficulties seeing.

Reading is also more difficult.   to because I cannot see the words, but more and more, the letters don't make words.  I have had that issue off and on for a long time, but it is really becoming an issue now.  Out Church sings "Praise" music and I don't know the songs.  Many times, I can't figure out the words in time to sing them!

Oh well, LBD progresses.  No surprise.

Friday, January 31, 2020

SCREW Mardi Gras!!!

OK, I am very agitated, so this post may be  RAW but it will display how seemingly small things fore me up!

The community I live in, filled with liturgical libtards, loves to celebrate Mardi Gras.  They have a 20 foot long display case filled with mannequins dressed up like the tras people in New Orleans.  They have a Fat Tuesday meal, and get all giddy about this sacrilegious  celebration of debauchery and sin!!  Then, they all go to the priest on ash Wednesday and get their forgiveness and ashes on their forehead!   

Celebrating Mardi Gras is against God's will, the written WORD, and all that Christ taught us and dies for.   If you don't agree, I hope you like high heat for eternity!

Today, Linda and I were headed out for our walk.  As a precursor, she had a later Jurassic movie on the TV that was agitating me.  So, I was on edge.   As we passed the Mardi Gras display case, she wanted to find the mouse!  They hide a gray mouse every week in the display case. and it is fun to find it!  It is a good mental exercise.

But, I will not even look at the Mardi Gras or Halloween displays!  So, I went to the end and waited for her.  A couple that I am friendly with, asked me if I had found the mouse yet?  I replied no, I would not look at the Mardi Gras display because Mardi Gras is sacrilegious.  The lady asked me why, so I told her, using some rather "Blue" descriptions of Mardi Gras.  She agreed with me, and then I sat down in a chair.

When Linda came to get me and continue our walk, I told her I though I should not walk anymore but go back to the cabin.  And here I am, pissed off, blood pressure raging, and ready to explode.

I wish everyone would realize what agitates me and keep those things away from me when I am with them.  Shoot-em up bang bang movies have been off my viewing list for at least three years!!  And I am on record for hating anything the liturgical church does.

On the good side, the Neudexta does work.  I did not totally blow up and there are no injuries. So, I guess it was a good day.

Friday, January 24, 2020

The passing of a Lewy Body Warrior

Tomorrow is the Memorial Service for a friend of mine, who died from the complications of Lewy Body Dementia.  She was a strong, relentless, Lewy Body Warrior.  And trust me, she had all of the worst issues of Lewy Body Dementia.  In the end, her autonomic functions stopped and she could not even swallow.  She lost her ability to speak about two years ago, yet, she still let everyone know how she was doing.  Always had a smile, always liked to meet new people and make new friends.  Her husband was her caregiver and he should be awarded caregiver of the Decade!  He even learned to do her hair and her make-up!

Peggy passed away Christmas Morning.  Her strong, life long faith in the Finished Work of Christ on the Cross gives her family and everyone who knew her, the reassurance that we will see Peggy again, in Heaven.

Her family has asked that in lieu of flowers, a donation to the Lewy Body Dementia Association (LBDA.ORG) be given.  I encourage everyone who reads my blog to do just that, in the Memory of Peggy Gideons.  Linda and I are going to donate, and I pray you will also.

Peggy will be missed, but she will never be forgotten.

Wednesday, January 8, 2020

Sorry, it has been a long time since I posted!!

It has been a long time since I posted anything.  Not that  have not wanted too, but I just cannot organize my thoughts to write them.   The Christmas holidays are always a very down time for me, even before LBD.  Not that the fact the Jesus Christ stepped into the stream of Humanity, solely to pay the price for our sins, should not be a great celebration.  But the commercialization and my childhood experiences have caused me to run from the Christmas season.

Also, I have been having far more difficulty expressing myself in any manner.  I am trying to control my agitation and be more calm around Linda and others.  No one should have to deal with my outbursts.  However, some family issues arose during the Holidays that threw a hand grenade into any enjoyment that might have been there.

How am I doing.  Worse, more reclusive, the hallucinations are back and more active, I have difficulty speaking, expressing myself, dealing with groups of people, and watching anything but home improvement shows on TV.   I even turned off football games that had bad officiating because I got so agitated by the direction of the games.  And please tell everyone that knows me not to mention college sports of any kind.  I hate the mere idea of college sports.  You go to college for knowledge, not sports.  And please explain to me how the NCAA can make $55 Billion a year on Football alone and be tax exempt!!  Some people try to engage me on college football and they get FLAME SPRAYED!!

I am just not the social person I once was.  I am unhappy, mad at the world, and in general, not real good to be around.  Not that I do that on purpose.  I do nougat up every morning thinking, I am going to be a real nasty person today!!  But, sometimes, I just can't control it.   The "Cabin" continues to be my refuge.

Oh, "The Cabin".  In the midst of Christmas, the family explosion, and my LBD getting more nasty, I had to move room because of some upcoming construction.  Now the Azalea Trace Staff went to great ends to make my move as smooth and gentle as possible.  The remodeled the room I was moving into.  The flooring I bought for the original "Cabin" is no longer available.  So, I mad a selection that is good, but not near as good as what I had.  And even though they did everything very well, I still had moments of agitation and anger.  It took me three days to get settled in my "New Cabin".  But, I am now settled, secure, and comfortable.  But it did add to the issues.

The Memory Support Group we started continues to be a comfort to me and those who attend.  We are up to 23 members!  And I must say, they are all great, brave, supportive folks.  We are all blessed!

So, I will make every effort mental possible to post more.  I truly do apologize for my absence, but I believe I have explained why I was UA!  Happy New Years!  2020!  How the Hell did we get here?!

Sunday, November 24, 2019

Linda's Testing Results!

Well, that was quick!  We received an email from our Neurologist Friday night telling us her results were totally normal!  No sign of plaques or tangles.  No brain degradation.  No Alzheimer's!  Outstanding.

So, now;  what is her problem.  I went to the Internet and looked up the side effects of some of the drugs she takes.  BOOM!!!! There it was.  Zoloft, is not supposed to be prescribed for people over 65!!  It causes dementia like issues including memory issues, sight issues, and instability walking. The warning says when people over 65 take Zoloft, they are at aa higher risk of falling and breaking a hip, leg, or arm!

She has stopped taking Zoloft and we were supposed to see our GP tomorrow for a scheduled appointment.  Today, they called us and said she had an unplanned issue and they canceled our appointment.  Since the GP prescribed Zoloft, we were anxious to see her.   But, she is not the most informed, up to date, well researched, doctor I have ever seen, so who cares,  My Wife is off Zoloft.  And we will see if her dementia like issues go away.

Of course, the neurologist we see knew she was on Zoloft too!  You would think she might have tried getting her off that med before we had the PET scan that we may have to pay for out of pocket.

I have said this before;  Medical care in Pensacola is poor at best!  Do not move to the Panhandle of Florida if you want to see a doctor that cares about you or knows anything discovered past 1920!!

Maybe it is time to move.

Saturday, November 23, 2019

Linda' Testing

Yesterday, we went to get Linda's PET scan for Alzheimer's and PCA, Posterior Cortical Atrophy.  The Hospital we went to was exceptionally modern and very professional.  The entire experience was bathed in caring concern and professionalism.  We were impressed!  This test is designed to find the plaques and tangles that are the markers and cause of Alzheimer's and related diseases.   Since she has all the symptoms of PCA, that would also be identified by this test.  It is a simple test and not invasive.  She had to fast the night before  and then she had an IV of the things the PET Scan looks for.  The testing took 90 minutes start to finnish!

Now, we wait for the results.

Why get this test?  Well, for one thing, a new drug that stops Alzheimer's in os's tracks is in Level 3 testing with great results.  Its is presently called BAN 2401.  You can look up these tests on the Centers for Disease Control WEBSITE.   And since the PET scan can find Alzheimer's 20 years before the first symptom appears, it may be the end of Alzheimer's when coupled with the BAN 2401 drug.

Some insurances will not pay for the PET scan and we do not know if our insurances will pay or not. If not, we will have to pay about $4000 for the test.  Expensive, yes.   But the benefits may be really BIG!  I have spent much more on worse things than this!  Again, we will see.